Earn The Love: Character-Driven Romance That Actually Feels Believable

I didn't grow up seeking out romance novels when I was scouring the shelves at my local Barnes & Noble or book fairs. But somehow, I always ended up giggling and kicking my feet at the love stories—and reading them wayyy too many times. Whether it was a subplot or the main attraction, I couldn't help gravitating toward characters who were falling for each other. By the time I got to college, I was hooked on romance as a genre.

Today, people love to say that the genre in question is oversaturated. I've even had friends who complained that romance is all anyone's publishing now. However, I don't think too many love stories are the problem. I think the real issue is that too many of those stories are built on insta-love and surface-level lust.

What's missing is earned intimacy. Real connection. Characters who don't just *beep beep beep beep beep* (that's me censoring all the surface-level lustful swearing). So, that's precisely what we're going to dig into! Let's talk about what it takes to build a meaningful romance that does your characters justice.

Before The Love Story, There's A Life Story

Your protagonists are not just lovers. They are people, too. Regardless of whether they met at five or thirty-five, they were people long before they knew the other existed. Naturally, that means you need to individualize them.

What drives them? What haunts them? What are they afraid to admit, even to themselves? Their goals should go beyond "fall in love, get married, and have a white picket fence," while their backstories should go beyond "had an ex that absolutely sucked." The more they feel like living, breathing people, the more readers are going to root for their happy ending—and not just where the romance is concerned.

Once you've fully fleshed out your characters, one test I recommend is stripping away the romance plot. Ask yourself if you'd still want to follow both of them through another genre, were they to be plopped into another fictional universe. If the answer is no, dig deeper. Because if they aren't interesting outside of being love interests, the romance isn't going to hold up as well as you wished it would.

Chemistry Doesn't Stop At The Physical

I'm not the type of gal who goes after books with abs on the covers. Of course, that isn't to say that we don't love a good six-pack, amirite? But the great stuff happens when the characters start to SEE each other, not just SEE each other.

I'm talking about their talents, their habits, their off-the-cuff dry humor. It's also the grand and gradual reveals of emotional scars and fears, allowing someone else into places they usually keep guarded. Real chemistry lives in the moments where the love interests are surprised by each other, in the best way. A big part of that is vulnerability. No matter where that vulnerability comes from, your readers are frothing at the mouth to see some walls come down.

And then there's the banter. It's not just for the laughs! When you do dialogue well, you show readers how your protagonists challenge and support one another, or else drive the other completely insane. While there can still be surprises in it (like a quiet grump making a laugh-out-loud observation), the key is to make sure that dialogue fits their personalities. Keep their tone, delivery, and language choices true to them.

The Road To Falling In Love Has Potholes

If I had a dollar for every "this could've been solved with one conversation" Goodreads review, I wouldn't need to work a day in my life. Miscommunication is one of those tropes that is just so easy to do, and while I don't believe, by any means, that it's the worst route to take... it can be frustrating for the reader if that's where the whole thing is headed.

When it comes to the conflict between your main characters, it needs to be grounded in something real. This points right back to the individual traits of those characters. Maybe one is terrified of putting themself out there again after facing betrayal from their closest friend. Maybe the other's sense of self-worth is tied to success because of their parents (who clearly never wanted to have kids). Whatever it is, that inner struggle should push against the romance as you're shaping it.

There's also external conflict, which pushes back even harder. Are they tested because of long-distance after they finally got together? Are they a caretaker or a parent who has to split their time and priorities? Is one of them a celebrity or an undercover agent who is withholding their identity? The possibilities truly are limitless for adding some tension to the pressure cooker.

Who Do Your Characters Become In The End?

At the end of it all, you need to understand what love has given your characters that they couldn't have gone without. Love should be what helps them achieve their individual goals or face their individual fears. It should push them toward growth, teaching them to be the best versions of themselves.

Your protagonists cannot grow together if they don't grow on their own. And one cannot experience an evolution without the other doing so, as well. But that doesn't mean the changes have to be linear or to the same degree, nor should they be. Given the conflicts they're facing, make them experience backslides or resistance, just like real people do.

Happily ever after doesn't mean everything is tied in a neat little bow. That's why you might even hear some folks using "happy for now," instead. Your couple may still have work to do once you've reached the conclusion, and that's okay. You just have to provide readers with a sense of commitment and hope that lets the ending feel right for where they are.

(Though, if you want to write an extended epilogue where they're thriving years later... I'm certainly not stopping you.)

((Give me the extended epilogue, dang it!!))

Happy writing!

~Meg